Anxiety disorders are an increasingly common problem. The fact that it is so current does not imply that all people have understood what it really means to have an anxiety. And it is that the consequences of anxiety are reflected in all areas of life, especially in the relationship. Is it possible to prevent anxiety from affecting the couple? Pay a lot of attention!
Consequences of anxiety in the couple
Obviously your partner should not ignore your anxiety problem, but should try by all means that the consequences of the emotional disorder do not have such an impact on the relationship that it destroys it. Unfortunately, there are many cases in which anxiety puts an end to a stable relationship and the main culprit is the lack of information.
We can perfectly imagine how it can affect your partner if you suffer from, for example, a panic disorder. Frightened and anguished, you stop doing countless things that you used to do together and your partner fails to understand the extent of your fear. The same occurs in the case of obsessive, where it becomes terrible to live with forced rituals to provide fictitious security.
Although it is the generalized that most couples have to deal with. Aspects such as insecurity, fear, self-demand, the desire to have everything under control and a pessimistic and negative perception of day-to-day life can turn living as a couple into a real hell. But we can’t let anxiety kill love.
How to avoid the consequences of anxiety in the couple?
The couple will inevitably be affected when an anxiety problem appears. But the impact of relationship anxiety can go in two directions: either destroy the relationship, or reinforce it. For a couple to be strengthened after a disorder of this type, it is necessary for both of them to fight together against anxiety. Ace? The couple will have to have all the information possible about the anxiety problem.
A couple who is informed about what an anxiety disorder entails, about its possible, who recognizes its symptoms, who is aware of the treatments, who observes which remedies are effective, who sees how they progress together in recovery, will be a capable couple. Coping with and overcoming anxiety.
However, it is common for the couple to close themselves off in the misunderstanding, to walk away because they do not understand fear, or the behaviors derived from anxiety, because they do not recognize their partner who has lost control. Love, understanding, empathy and involvement are all that is needed to overcome an anxiety problem together.
The effects of anxiety on the couple
What do you see from the outside when you? You can see your partner with frequent crying spells, with anguish, with sadness, living in permanent confusion where anxiety does not let them do practically anything. You can see a couple that is unmotivated, tired, exhausted and that considerably reduces activities both individually and as a couple.
You can also see an insecure, dependent, demanding couple, with obvious problems managing emotions. And it wasn’t like that before, was it? The most common thing is that you think that your relationship is going badly, that it is like this because of something that has happened in your relationship even if you do not know what it is. You may even feel guilty for seeing your partner like this, for thinking that you are the cause, or for feeling unable to help.
You have to keep in mind that anxiety is a very complex disorder in which a single cause cannot be established, much less a single consequence. Your partner is going through a very complicated time and although the cause does not have to be anything that is happening in the relationship, it is evident that it affects both of you.
Relationships suffer from anxiety because it is common to think that you no longer recognize that person with anxiety. Ibis not maintained, it is normal for misunderstandings to appear that over time become insurmountable. But this happens because of that silence and misunderstanding that surrounds mental health. Would you get mad at your partner for having to help them when they broke their leg in an accident? Probably not.
And yet, you are greatly disturbed by this other relief that is anxiety. Anxiety is scary, not only for the person who is suffering from it, but also for those around them. Because they don’t understand their mechanism, because they don’t understand their motives, or the reactions they provoke. Because they see that life with anxiety becomes hell without really knowing how or why. And because deep down, deep down, they know that one day they too may suffer from this same disease.
There are not a few couples who cannot bear the test of a disorder such as anxiety or depression, which often appear together, and end up breaking up. But keep in mind that your partner knows as little about what is happening to him as you do. Also keep in mind that your partner is scared because they do not recognize themselves in that person with anxiety. Also keep in mind that you need, more than your help, your support, your understanding and that extra security that you have to have yourself but that you currently lack.
How to help your partner if they have anxiety?
Logically you want to help your partner who is suffering from anxiety and surely you don’t know how to do it. Nobody knows. The most effective help your partner can receive is that. And what is your role as a couple in this whole process? Be patient, have empathy and be very clear that you want to support and care for your partner.
Because a person with anxiety requires care and each person will need different ones. But what no person with anxiety needs is for their partner to put another point of uncertainty in their life, of insecurity, that undermines their self-esteem, that they do not value it, that they do not remind them that they love them, that they do not tell them that everything It will work out, that he reproaches him for his emotional state, that he tells him that he is weak. And never, ever detract from the suffering you are going through.
The person is not in that situation for pleasure, they are not like this because they want to and of course they want to recover. Give your partner time to recover, don’t pressure them to go out, to do things, to be happy. Stay by her side from her but without taking away her space from her. May she find in you a person who, without really knowing what is happening, is supporting her, encouraging her and accompanying her on this path.
The best way to help your partner not to let anxiety affect your relationship is to be part of that recovery, take an interest in psychological therapy, go to a psychologist to find out what things can help your partner the most, learn about the treatments and, ultimately, show your partner that they are not alone in this. There are many couples who break up as a result of an anxiety disorder, but there are other couples who come out stronger and more united than ever.